Ep. 5: The Ethical Implications of AI on the Modern Man

On episode 5 of the Playing With Traffic podcast - it's time to get intellectual. Vinnie and Konner debate how rapid acceptance of changing technologies impacts the character of modern society, while Max practices to become a new kind of Austin Powers

EMETAPHOBIA WARNING, SPOILER WARNING FOR SNOWPIERCER (2013). 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Max makes me sick and this is all. This is Max's fault. Yeah, true. He's a pig fucker.

SPEAKER_08 0:11

I'm not a pig fucker.

SPEAKER_00 0:15

He's a bad man and he's mean to his friends.

SPEAKER_04 0:17

Yeah, I'm also gonna Okay. He hung up. He's really actually truly upset with Emacs. I didn't do anything. So should I restart my recording or no?

SPEAKER_07 0:26

No, just let it ride. I'm gonna start the recording to match the audio. Um Pigfucker.

SPEAKER_04 0:33

Dog sucker.

SPEAKER_11 0:35

Gaff tape.

SPEAKER_07 0:38

Gaff tape?

unknown 0:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 0:40

Gaff tape. What is gaff tape?

SPEAKER_11 0:43

It's uh it's the colloquialism, but it's also known as gaffer's tape. It's like this black strong tape that you use a lot for stage stuff.

SPEAKER_07 0:51

Oh, it's not like a sexual thing.

SPEAKER_11 0:54

No, no, no, no, no. It's a real I have some right now.

SPEAKER_04 0:57

Oh, did you did you have that written down like on your desk? No, I have two in my hand. You didn't you didn't like the first word you said? You were like, oh I got this, I got this.

SPEAKER_11 1:07

I'm holding gaff tape right now. I I have it in my ham. That's why I said it. You have it in your ham? It's in my ham. We could make up a sexual thing for gaff tape though, like uh like uh urban dictionary entry for gaff tape.

SPEAKER_04 1:23

Yeah. What would what would you posit that to be?

SPEAKER_10 1:27

Um when you put a bunch of pubes on a piece of tape and then put it on your upper lip like a mustache.

SPEAKER_07 1:40

When you put a bunch of gaff tape on your peepee and the peepee tries to come out, but it doesn't, so your balls get big and inflated, and your penis gets big and inflated, and then it blows up like a water balloon, and then you take off the gaff tape, and then the pee comes out and it goes.

SPEAKER_03 2:00

I think that was it.

SPEAKER_08 2:06

That's good. No, that's really good. We should submit it.

SPEAKER_07 2:11

That's what we gotta submit it.

SPEAKER_11 2:12

Yeah, that's the gap tape.

SPEAKER_04 2:16

I think that I think that I think that we should uh have a Thanksgiving special where we um record in person and we are each eating turkeys with our hands.

SPEAKER_07 2:31

Yeah. Alright, I'm sold.

SPEAKER_11 2:33

What about a little sexy cock?

SPEAKER_07 2:35

Yeah, I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_04 2:36

I was thinking we'd all be you know just wearing basketball shorts and nothing else.

SPEAKER_11 2:39

Yeah, I'm sold. I do like that. I don't have any basketball shorts, though, so I gotta pick me up some and ones before we record, but I'm in.

SPEAKER_04 2:48

You don't have any basketball shorts at all? I don't believe it. You don't have any basketball shorts? Even done a layup?

SPEAKER_11 2:56

Uh I can do I can do a fucking what do they call it? Like a reverse layup or whatever where you like do it on the other side.

SPEAKER_04 3:03

Oh, the reverse layup where you stand with your legs really wide and you hold the ball with two hands and you like start really low and then you like throw it up underhand style. Yeah. Exactly.

SPEAKER_07 3:13

Did you know that did you know that you can't do that without a pair of basketballs? You can't do that without a pair of basketball shorts, though, so you're lying. I can do it in fucking dickies. No, I'm saying like le like actually like scientifically proven to be impossible with basketball shorts. So you're fucking liar.

SPEAKER_04 3:29

Yeah, if you're not in basketball shorts, you can use testicular torsion.

SPEAKER_11 3:34

Einstein called he says M squee MC liar. M squeeze M squee! Wait, yeah, we should do that. I'm into that. Uh I will be in Tennessee starting early that week, so we might need to figure it out. Also, my car is broken.

SPEAKER_07 3:56

Yeah, we would come to you.

SPEAKER_11 3:57

It is in a lot somewhere. I have not paid for it. I'm not sure if it's there. I'm not sure if I'll have a catalytic converter when I go back. What? Who knows? What? Yeah, I got towed on September 29th by me to a lot that I have my friend provided me with that I haven't paid yet.

SPEAKER_04 4:14

So um interesting. Yeah.

SPEAKER_11 4:18

Maxi might have no car. Maxie lost his golf clubs.

SPEAKER_04 4:21

But okay, um, yeah, and like a hundred pounds of refuse that you spent many times. I mean, that was a compost bin. You lost some really good compost.

SPEAKER_11 4:31

Yeah, no, I mean we could make energy out of what was in that car. You're telling me that's a good one. It yeah. Dude, I'll send you a snapshot photo of when we cleaned it out one time when I lived with Connor. It's pretty atrocious. Was there a dead animal? No. Or evidence of an animal. There was evidence of an animal. There was little poops. Okay.

SPEAKER_07 4:54

So you just tear out the trash and there's a fucking like dead rat that's been fucking burned out.

SPEAKER_11 5:00

We thought we were gonna find one, yeah. There was food too. There was food, there's little poops, there was like year-old food. Oh shit. I realized last this morning when I woke up, I went to my bathroom and I have like a back door, and I left my back door open all night because I was letting my uh oven air out. It was getting a little smoky. And there's some big opossums that live in my backyard, like some big fuckers. So I'm a little bit nervous if they're gonna jump out at me at some point today, but I don't know. I haven't seen anything yet. Now it's freaking me out thinking about it.

SPEAKER_04 5:34

They're friendly, man.

SPEAKER_11 5:35

They're no, they're not. They're cute, but they're not friendly.

SPEAKER_05 5:40

Dude, you can walk up to one.

SPEAKER_07 5:44

You can walk up to one and they'll just like play dead and like open their mouth at you and hiss a bunch, but they'll never bite you. One time I'll never there's some possums. Well, I don't know about never, but there were some possums on my parents because my parents had like six acres of land. There's some possums digging around the trash. So I chased them for a while. And eventually they just stopped moving, and then you just I just picked up with my bare hand and fucking walked it out to the edge of the property and set it down, and it just kind of like sat there and stared at me. And this because I watched TikTok of well, I had a glove on, obviously. It's not my bare hand, but it's only because I watched a TikTok of a guy with a glove on put his hand in a wild possum's mouth and it didn't even clamp down.

SPEAKER_11 6:25

It just was like, it was literally just like Did he do the thing like uh did he do the thing like people do with their dogs where you go up and down and you go she might have fucking pissed it off?

SPEAKER_04 6:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_11 6:38

I want to go to a possum so bad. Dude, if I might be able to. There's one in your house. I would be so happy. Yeah, he lives with me. Now his name is Gerald. Gerald. Gerald, me and Gerald taking over the world, scaring the hus.

SPEAKER_07 6:57

Scaring the hus. Me and Gerald.

SPEAKER_11 7:02

Now, Connor, I'd like to ask you a question. Yeah. And it's about one of the topics that you brought for this week. Okay. Do you mind?

SPEAKER_07 7:12

I'm ready.

SPEAKER_11 7:13

No, I mean let it rip, dude. Now you said you typed in the chat AI Blunt.

SPEAKER_04 7:20

Oh.

SPEAKER_11 7:21

And I just need I I've been trying to wrap my head around it since I read it, and I've got nothing.

SPEAKER_04 7:26

This is really not a good um segue after the way that things have started. Are we gonna get angry again? Yeah, absolutely we are. Um I swear to God.

SPEAKER_07 7:39

I swear to God, no, we're not doing this now. Alright, hold on. My fucking neurons just started firing. No, we're not doing this. No, no, no. You can't tell him.

SPEAKER_04 7:51

Okay.

SPEAKER_11 7:52

Wait, I you guys already discussed this.

SPEAKER_04 7:54

This is this was something that I dropped while we were together because of uh of a discussion.

SPEAKER_07 8:01

You can't the fucking people this they're gonna think differently of me.

SPEAKER_04 8:06

You want me to you want me to stop? We can cut this out.

SPEAKER_07 8:08

We can No, I'm I'm we'll cut this part out. I'm just joking, dude. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 8:13

Alright. No. Uh yeah, anyway. So fucking uh Vinny Vinny came over. Vinny came over and we were we were doing as we do, you know, we were rolling a little bit. As boys do. Uh and so you know, I was doing as God intended with my hands, and I was getting to know what I was working with and creating something truly beautiful. Oh my god. Um and Vinny uh was making an AI blunt. Okay, uh he was using a knife to split.

SPEAKER_07 8:48

Ooh. Dude, I could have been using scissors. What if I used scissors?

SPEAKER_04 8:53

If you use scissors, you just wouldn't be allowed to be around me anymore. Exactly. Could be worse. But but Vinny, Vinny fuck it, he used a knife to split it, and then it was like falling apart. It was kind of scuffed. And it was it was AI, it was ChatGPT in that shit. Smoking it fucking made me diagonal is not good.

SPEAKER_11 9:16

Have you always been a little baby?

SPEAKER_07 9:18

No, I have not always been a little baby.

SPEAKER_11 9:21

You always been a 12-year-old smoking for the first time?

SPEAKER_07 9:23

I just recently started using a knife because okay, you know what? You know what? Yeah. Yeah. You are let it fly. The fucking people who are anti-knife to open up a little a little blunski, right? Their anti-progressive mentality is what's holding this country back. It's what's holding this country back. Oh, oh, we have to oh use our hands to split the blunt rep. Oh, and also make sure that we make sure that we pedal our cars to to the fucking old ye old schoolhouse for our daily lecture about Jesus. We're in the future. We're in the future.

SPEAKER_11 10:07

You think using the knife is sophisticated and not moving for babies?

SPEAKER_04 10:11

So you're saying it's not an AI blunt, but what what I do in which time?

SPEAKER_07 10:16

You know what? It is an AI blunt because it's the future.

SPEAKER_08 10:23

So to listen to Bob Marley. You think he was using a knife to cut open his blunts?

SPEAKER_07 10:30

No, because at the time that Bob Marley was alive rolled blunts. At the time that he was rolling blunts, that was a that was just the time. That was just when it was supposed to be. No, they didn't have phones, computers, they didn't even have uh they didn't even have bikes. We didn't even look at porn on our computers. They don't even have they didn't even have porn back then. Like of course of course they used their hands back then. Now that we have porn and cars, yeah, I'm gonna use a knife to cut a blunt.

SPEAKER_04 11:03

But also the big like, I mean, let's talk the results though, right? Yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_07 11:08

I rolled a magnificent, beautiful, wonderful blunt the other day with a knife, but I come to your house, have to use a fucking steak knife. Yeah, there's gonna be problems.

SPEAKER_11 11:16

You got performance anxiety, dude. Yeah, and also my hands.

SPEAKER_04 11:21

No, the thing is, dude, you were we we we've already been over this, you know. Like I was I was the dada. I got to I got to know my wife. I was stepdad. It was my little it was my little baby, and you're the stepdad, and it didn't like you very much. It didn't like the way that you were doing that.

SPEAKER_11 11:37

You didn't learn at secrets, dude.

SPEAKER_04 11:39

Yeah, you know what?

SPEAKER_07 11:40

I might be the technical, but I was the dad that stepped up. And I've said that four times now.

SPEAKER_04 11:45

It was a half step.

SPEAKER_07 11:47

It was a half step. I got him through middle school. Maybe even a ramp. I got him through high school. I got him through middle school.

SPEAKER_11 11:54

Now I am a stepfather surgeon. I'm very good, I can pearl pretty much anything except a backwood. To be fair, those things are fucking hard to work with. Jesus Christ. And I think that the thumb tear creating your own line gives you a better product at the end of the day. Well, the blunt wrap itself has like it's got intricacies. Like Connor's saying, you gotta you gotta get to know it. It's got little curves, it's got little dimples, but it's got a cute little button nose. And when you do the thumb tear, it works around those those qualities better than just cutting straight through it.

SPEAKER_07 12:43

You know, I'll never use a knife again. How about that? I promise, I swear. Yep!

SPEAKER_08 12:47

Yep, I promise I swear AI art out. AI blunts out. Okay, this is 2027, baby. The future, not tomorrow.

SPEAKER_07 12:58

Tools. We skipped a year. We're fucking cavemen bowing rocks together to make fires, okay?

SPEAKER_11 13:05

Hey, there's something about being industrious like that. You know what I mean? Maybe that's not what industrious means, but maybe that's the exact opposite of what industrious means. I don't even know.

SPEAKER_07 13:15

Uh during the industrial revolution. What do you think that would be?

SPEAKER_11 13:19

Yeah, my grasp of the English lexicon is fleeting at best.

SPEAKER_07 13:23

A Victorian's age child would see a fucking pop, would eat a Pop Tart and die.

SPEAKER_11 13:29

I might too. I love Pop Tarts so big. I'm getting so big.

SPEAKER_07 13:34

Pop-tarts are like crack, but like deep.

SPEAKER_11 13:37

Did you haven't eaten rice krispies for breakfast? Like it's a fucking breakfast food, dude, and they got little MMs, dude. With the MMs in it? Yeah. Except their MMs are shit.

SPEAKER_04 13:50

What do you mean?

SPEAKER_11 13:51

They got the shit ones.

SPEAKER_04 13:53

Like poop names?

SPEAKER_11 13:55

Yeah, they got poopin' them. Poopin'ems? Poopin'ems. Poopin'em. Yeah, they're poopin' them. You know how people say like folks in them?

SPEAKER_04 14:04

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_11 14:04

Yeah. What about poopin' them?

SPEAKER_04 14:06

Yeah. Poopin' them.

SPEAKER_07 14:07

We should start that. We'll bring that back with with gup. Or no, bub. Bub, bub. Yeah. And squart. And squart and pre-brown.

SPEAKER_11 14:17

And and now we got poopin' them. And now we got puff fall so hey, so to transition actually out of AI Blood into another topic that you brought up. Could you read off the one that you did at 9 57 a.m.?

SPEAKER_04 14:37

Oh, that you should audition for Jamaican Austin Powers?

SPEAKER_11 14:40

Yeah, lay that out for me. If you don't mind. Walk me there.

SPEAKER_04 14:44

I mean, I feel like I feel like it's a relatively simple concept. I mean, you just kind of flip the flip the script on Austin Powers, introduce a Jamaican accent. And I mean, I don't think that any key components of the you know, like the aspects of who he is need to necessarily change. I mean, of course, there's certain stereotypes, you know, like maybe he likes smoking weed, right? Maybe he likes reggae music. You know, he probably probably would have dreads instead of having like a union jack, it would be like the Jamaican flag.

SPEAKER_11 15:15

Yeah, the red, green, yellow thing.

SPEAKER_04 15:17

Um but like, you know, I just think you'd be doing like a Jamaican patois accent. Well, I'm sorry, you know, asking like do I do I make you horny baby type of thing? You know?

SPEAKER_11 15:31

Do I make you horny baby? I was gonna say, Connor, did you it's actually hard to do his accent. It's hard to do a Jamaican accent. What does he say? Does he say groovy baby all the time? Is that Austin Powers? Um Groovy Batman.

SPEAKER_01 15:48

I'd really like I'd really like for you to just do what you think Austin Powers does.

SPEAKER_08 15:56

Groovy nasty gal oe.

SPEAKER_11 16:00

It's a mean pussy galor. Wait, no, that's actually uh James Bond. What was it in Austin Powers? Me and I van. Damn, I can't. I'm sounding like Count Dracula right now. It's hard to do what he does as a Jamaican. Holy shit.

SPEAKER_07 16:15

Uh-huh. Um this is like CCP, dude, but like not horrible.

SPEAKER_04 16:20

Yeah. CCP? CCP! Oh shit, oh shit. Where you gotta stitch for that?

SPEAKER_07 16:26

Where you gotta stitch that? We're gonna get fucking we're gonna get limited now. You can't hold on, you gotta turn that off.

unknown 16:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 16:34

We're not gonna be able to air this in China now. Shit.

SPEAKER_04 16:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 16:40

No, no, no. CC. What does that okay? CCK. This is like CCK, but like worse. It's more racist somehow.

unknown 16:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_08 16:48

Groovy but Stephan!

SPEAKER_11 16:52

CCP. Let me just look up some Austin Powers quotes really quick.

SPEAKER_01 16:56

Louis CCK. Smoking a panty.

SPEAKER_08 17:02

The listeners don't know what CCK means, which is very good for us. But it never will. Louis DCK is fucking awesome. Louis DC. I have a bit that I'm gonna do for that after we record, but I just can't wait to unkill the video. You have to run it.

SPEAKER_04 17:25

Just run it and I can edit it out.

SPEAKER_10 17:26

I can edit it out. No, no, no, no. We'll do it later. We'll do it later. We'll do it later.

SPEAKER_07 17:30

Please, CTK Pounder.

SPEAKER_11 17:37

Okay, you want to edit this out? It's kind of funny. Yeah, yeah. Someone asked a question. Do you know how many people you've masturbated in front of this year? And then he goes, Well, in front of gangs or in front of singular people? And then boom.

SPEAKER_02 17:55

Why would we edit that out? That's fucking amazing. That's beautiful.

SPEAKER_11 18:04

Dude, I'm a fucking poet and I didn't even know it.

unknown 18:07

Wow.

SPEAKER_04 18:08

Wow. Max, you gotta you gotta start actually uh I was thinking I th I was thinking that we could reboot your rap career. You think so? Yeah, I was singing Tom McDonald needs competition.

SPEAKER_08 18:19

Shagadelic. What about that?

SPEAKER_02 18:26

That's pretty good.

SPEAKER_11 18:27

Oh, behave. I'm looking sorry, that was not good. That was good. I mean, my acting career is in the in the dumps. Also, did you just say that Tom McDonald needs some competition?

SPEAKER_04 18:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_11 18:40

Yeah, that guy needs a bullet to the teeth. That edit that out. Sorry, I don't mean that. Uh you meant that.

SPEAKER_07 18:46

I'm not in that. Well, I'm not in that.

SPEAKER_11 18:48

It's up to Connor, really. Who the fuck is that? I am not Tom McDonald. You don't you don't need to know, man. It's just not even worth the time.

SPEAKER_04 18:56

You know what's crazy too about all these like No, you do know because you remember, okay, I'm gonna edit out his name, but when we were in his uh his like fucking Tacoma, he was just chain smoking cigarettes and he had a CD of just one Tom McDonald song that was playing on loop while we were driving to the fucking bowling alley.

SPEAKER_11 19:19

See, that's who that guy speaks to. You know what I mean? That's who Tom McDonald's making movie music for. Don't we all recognize that like maybe they're not that cool? Maybe they don't know what they're talking about. He burned a CD with one song. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 19:37

Like, what are we fucking doing, man?

SPEAKER_07 19:40

I do have a new song that just came out that I think that you I think you guys need to do.

SPEAKER_04 19:45

I know, I think I know exactly what you're what you're gonna be uh did you guys still listen to?

SPEAKER_07 19:50

I'm not gonna say the name of the song all the time.

SPEAKER_11 19:52

You know what's so funny too is like him and like dude. I fucking knew it, man. The other guy we were talking about, too, they're they're Canadian. Man, they're Canadian. Why do they care so much about American politics?

SPEAKER_08 20:05

Shut the fuck up! Your country's awesome! Go back to it.

SPEAKER_04 20:09

Did you see, did you see uh Vinny, that like this has like almost 10,000 views on Spotify? This has how many? Yeah, Max Max is Max is advocating the mass deportation. I'm not sure. That's not what I'm saying. That's not what I'm saying at all.

SPEAKER_08 20:24

No, no, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_11 20:26

I'm just saying it makes me deeply upset when when people who have an awesome country with free healthcare that they can go back to, which rules I'm a citizen, by the way.

SPEAKER_04 20:36

Yeah. Awesome. Why don't you go back to your country live next, dude?

SPEAKER_11 20:40

I have anybody I don't actually I do have family there. I could go. It's just expensive. Montreal is fucking the coolest city on the planet I've ever live in there.

SPEAKER_04 20:49

It's just so expensive. Dude, that was cool. Can you say again?

SPEAKER_08 20:51

Montreal. Je m'appelle Max.

SPEAKER_11 21:00

Gravy, baby! Damn it, fuck. I'm still countracular. I can't get it right.

SPEAKER_04 21:03

I'm gonna have to practice this. The world tried to silence.

SPEAKER_11 21:08

Um yeah, that's it's just why why are why? Why why?

SPEAKER_04 21:14

But his voice remains.

SPEAKER_11 21:16

Are they coming and riling up all the the guy who smokes cigarettes in his car with the windows rolled up and burns his one song on the C D. In our country, when things are good, they can just go home. This isn't this is a different, much different situation. Never mind, we should just cut all this out. I'm gonna stop talking.

SPEAKER_07 21:37

No, I just thought that you are the most ardent no politics. We're not doing politics, and then here we are, you're like, Dumble down on really.

SPEAKER_11 21:45

I was doing that for you guys, man.

SPEAKER_04 21:49

For uh for me, for me, actually, um it's for me too. I don't really want to get into it. It was really I mean, Max, to be honest, it was really all for you. It's all free. You know what I'm saying? It's all for you.

SPEAKER_11 22:04

Up for you. Yeah. Hey, I thought of an idea for a segment for us to do each week. Okay, okay. So it's gonna involve some editing, which means we can veto it because I'm not the one who's actually pulling myself up by the bootstraps like Tom McDonald did.

SPEAKER_04 22:21

Rah.

SPEAKER_11 22:22

Um I don't know what the name of the segment would be just yet, but it would be that each week we bring each other the most heinous pictures that we can find on the internet that are funny things, like that mountain becoming that guy's bubble.

SPEAKER_07 22:38

Not just that guy, that's Nikakado Avocado for the audience who didn't know.

SPEAKER_11 22:42

Excuse me, I'm old, I'm gonna die soon. I have no idea who that is. He's a sexy baby.

SPEAKER_04 22:49

It's crazy that you don't know who that is, though. Truly.

SPEAKER_11 22:53

You guys know fucking fucking Peyton Manning?

SPEAKER_04 22:58

No, who the fuck is that? He's my uncle.

SPEAKER_07 23:01

Oh, okay. No way. Yeah. I forgot. I forgot that.

SPEAKER_11 23:06

You got a hot uncle.

SPEAKER_04 23:10

He's a really hot guy.

SPEAKER_11 23:12

You ever teach you how to throw a pig skin?

SPEAKER_04 23:14

He taught me how to be a girl in the bath.

unknown 23:16

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 23:25

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 23:29

Thanks, Uncle Peyton.

SPEAKER_11 23:32

Thank you, Uncle Peyton. Curtsies. What if that's the name of the podcast taught me how to be a girl?

SPEAKER_07 23:43

Teach me how to be a girl podcast featuring Peyton Manning.

SPEAKER_08 23:47

Featuring Peyton Manning and three dudes. There's no one to teach us here.

SPEAKER_04 23:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_11 23:54

Please, Peyton Manning, please come on the show, please. Do you guys do you guys like that idea?

SPEAKER_04 24:00

Um that we bring an image? Yes.

SPEAKER_11 24:06

Uh yeah, I'm down for that. I'll find one right now.

SPEAKER_04 24:09

Yeah, I mean, I yeah.

SPEAKER_11 24:10

Yeah, you seem to have like a cornucopia full of them.

SPEAKER_07 24:14

I just know where to look. Tom McDonald.com.

SPEAKER_04 24:19

I mean, I I technically already brought one, dude. Leather Kermit.

SPEAKER_11 24:22

That's true. Leather Kermit, Purple Homer. Dude. Oh shit, they're getting married.

SPEAKER_07 24:29

Leather Kermit and Purple Homer.

SPEAKER_04 24:32

Why does it look like they're at like a meeting? Well, it's the leather club.

SPEAKER_11 24:37

Oh, okay. Not weird at all.

SPEAKER_04 24:40

Yeah, I mean you see you see the balding man and the man with the leather cap. Yeah.

SPEAKER_11 24:46

Cool vest. Speaking of going bald, guys, I am down. Yeah, you're silver two, one. Drastically bad. I'm silver too. I went back up to gold, got almost to gold too again, and just had a historic run of the red carpet yesterday. I don't know if it's doable. And now I'm really starting to think about booking my flight to Turkey.

SPEAKER_01 25:11

Dude, you're gonna get the Turkish Turkish hair surgery, dude.

SPEAKER_11 25:16

I I literally will. Well because I'm gonna have to go bald if I'm not a liar. I could just not do it, but like you wanna be honest on your commitment.

SPEAKER_04 25:25

And also, but like the thing is, like the uh have you seen like the immediate aftermath of the Turkish?

SPEAKER_11 25:33

Yeah, you gotta be wrapped up for like six six months.

SPEAKER_04 25:36

Yeah, like you're gonna I don't know how you're gonna manage.

SPEAKER_11 25:41

I'll be wrapped up, Twin. Alright. It's either that or bald forever.

SPEAKER_07 25:47

My my um my question is how are you not getting better? You know, like well, some of it has to do with the amount of Adderall I consume.

SPEAKER_11 26:00

Okay. What does that mean? I had some days where I was really cranking it up. The Adderall? And those days were feeding me glorious blue carpet wins. Just fucking bust after bust after bust, 10 CS a minute big man, truck nuts back shots. You know what I mean? But um also sometimes it's just like I got agents on my team. Like there were two games where I win that I played yesterday where we absolutely smashed our lane, but not like smash it enough that I could carry the whole game, and then by eight minutes, every other lane and our jungler were 0-4. And there's just some weak-minded individuals out there who we take a really bad fight at like Dragon or Audacon, and they're like, Yep, we just FF now, it's over. And it's like, guys, pull the foam out of your ass. This is silver and gold. We're all fucking monkeys. We're we're typing on our keyboards with two fists. We can win this.

SPEAKER_07 27:00

Purple homer, purple homer.

SPEAKER_11 27:04

But yeah, I mean, you like you said yesterday, Vinny, there's still I still got a month, a little bit over a month. Yeah, you got time. I just don't understand. I'm not the truth, is I'm not a platinum player right now. I just know this to be true. I mean, well, I haven't done the work either. I haven't done a lot of video review, I haven't been doing my CS practice or like my orb walking practice. Like, there's things that I need to actually lock in and start doing instead of just believing I can smash my head into a wall and it'll work to get better. And that's that's just the truth. But it's so boring. I hate work, dude. I just want to fucking pull my little put until the goo gets out.

SPEAKER_03 27:50

I like the word put, dude. Yeah, putt is good, huh?

SPEAKER_11 27:55

PUD's good. I got a friend who's whose uh his stream name and his like online name is Puddle Puncher. And every time I see it, I just think about pulling on it. Making it long and thin. What else we got here? Um You guys doing uh you guys doing Thanksgiving shit?

SPEAKER_07 28:23

Yeah. I'm just going over with my dumpster reserved. That's about it.

SPEAKER_11 28:30

Dude, I wonder how many fucking turkeys we could get out the dumpster if we dumpster dive after Thanksgiving.

SPEAKER_04 28:36

No, dude, I do I do trash giving every year.

SPEAKER_11 28:39

What is that?

SPEAKER_04 28:41

Uh you don't eat until 12 30 a.m. Black Friday. Um and you just drive to like five or six different family diners and just grab all the scraps, dude. Um pickings. You just like lay a tarp in the back of your SUV, just fill it with all the shit you find, and then you just pull out the tarp, slap it in the backyard, go crazy, man.

SPEAKER_11 29:09

None of us have an SUV though.

SPEAKER_04 29:12

I know a couple guys in the garage doing some of the things.

SPEAKER_07 29:21

Why'd you say it like that?

SPEAKER_04 29:25

Max thinks it's so funny that I have a speech impediment that I'm really what are you talking about? I'm really trying to overcome it. Do you actually have a speech impediment?

SPEAKER_11 29:33

He does. I'm going to therapy for it. No, you're not. You're a grown man. And therapy's for babies. Okay.

SPEAKER_07 29:40

Well, that's that's definitely that's okay.

SPEAKER_08 29:44

I'm just joking. I think therapy's bad. Everybody should do it. It's a great thing.

SPEAKER_07 29:47

He's not joking. He's doing that right there. He thinks we think therapy is for babies.

SPEAKER_08 29:53

No, I don't. I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't know.

SPEAKER_07 29:55

And if we weren't streaming, if we weren't recording right now, he'd be saying slurs about people who go get fucking a bunch of Ford. Hey, censor that part. Centre part. Hey, Car. Center that part. Hey, Car. Hey, when you're done being a big old pussy and when you're not doing your speech therapy, let's get on editing that part out. Yeah, when you learn how to fucking talk finally, then you can edit that part out. No, but it is crazy that you did say that because he actually is speech therapy lately. It's been working pretty well. Wait, is that true? Yeah, it's I don't I mean there's a place in Detroit. Oh, I should say that. I can't uh in Detroit. In Detroit? There's a place in Detroit that he's been going to lately that we've been talking about over some lunch. I tell you guys about my uncle.

SPEAKER_11 30:45

What about your uncle? He's the fire chief of Detroit. Isn't that pretty cool?

SPEAKER_04 30:51

Wow. That's oh my god. I'm starstruck. Can I meet him and get his autograph and also like uh live in his house?

SPEAKER_07 31:01

Can I suck on this big fat cock?

SPEAKER_11 31:04

No, it's short and I wear his helmet, dude. How do you know that?

SPEAKER_07 31:07

Why do you know that?

SPEAKER_11 31:08

I've seen it in the bathtub. He tells me how to be and it comes full server.

SPEAKER_07 31:14

It's not Jamonka's a great guy. He'd never done that. It comes full. One of them. You think he'll ever listen to this? Because I just said that I want to suck.

SPEAKER_11 31:24

I really hope not. I told my mom that we were recording a podcast. She was like, Can I listen to the first episode? No. Nope. And then she was like, just tell me when you can listen to it. I can listen to an episode. And I'm like, and I've thought about it after every single episode, and it's like, definitely not that one. Definitely not that one. Talking about getting the ghoul out. Probably not that one. Yeah, there's we haven't had a uh we could do an SFW a momcast. Maybe that's Thanksgiving time because it's so wholesome we turkey with our hands like we're at Disney World. Like we're at Disney World, Connor. We're at Disney World.

SPEAKER_04 31:58

Um, I'm at Disney World.

SPEAKER_11 31:59

Dude, I want to go on soarin'. I want to go at Sorin! Have you guys ever been to Disney World? Either of you?

SPEAKER_07 32:05

Never. I have.

SPEAKER_11 32:08

Well, Vinny. What's up, first off? We're playing on a Disney World trip. We're all going to Disney World. We're gonna get fucking huge. We're gonna make our bellies so big.

SPEAKER_07 32:17

That'd be that would be cool. I just uh yeah, I've never been to I'll pay for you to go to Disney World first time.

SPEAKER_06 32:26

I'll buy your tickets, you just gotta buy your flights. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 32:30

Yeah, yeah. Sorry, I would accept that to you. What's up? Is it gonna be meals included?

SPEAKER_11 32:38

No, we are not gonna stay to Disney Resort because they're fucked up expensive. We're gonna stay at a Motel 6 and we're gonna bring peanut butter jelly fantasy in our suitcases, and we're only gonna eat peanut butter jellies. Max, this trip sucks. No, we're gonna go home. Disney World everyone. What? It's the most magic place on the world. I want to drink Lenin.

SPEAKER_04 33:02

But I want to drink the blue milk.

SPEAKER_11 33:04

Okay, we can drink some blue milk too. Because I also want to drink the blue milk. But none of us get to make lightsabers. It's like 400 fucking dollars. What if I want to make a lightsaber? Okay, that's on you then.

SPEAKER_08 33:16

You want to spend your own money making fucking lightsaber? Go ahead. I'm not paying for.

SPEAKER_11 33:22

Sorry for getting so excited. You just become a beast on the road. I'm gonna fucking see Tyler Wren and I'm gonna fucking beat his dumbass. Oh, wait, no, but the reason I brought up um Disney World is because my brother was telling me, and I didn't believe it was true, and then I did some Googling and it is true, there is a ride in Disney World called Big Thunder Mountain. And there is a well-kept secret, or I guess not well-kept secret, there is a it is a unofficial thing that most Disney employees who are working that ride know that if someone asks you if they can sit in the back, that you cue them up to do it, because there's thousands of internet articles, there's real life testimony from actual doctors who have recommended this that for whatever reason, sitting in the back of Old Thunder Mountain does wonders in shaking kidney stones loose. Isn't that the most it's so awesome? But that begs the question: is there any other medical you know, solves that Disney World has? Like if you go on Splash Mountain or now whatever it's called, the fucking uh what's the one with the frog?

SPEAKER_04 34:39

Isn't it still Splash Mountain?

SPEAKER_11 34:41

No, no, no, they rebranded it because that shit's erased.

SPEAKER_04 34:45

Oh. I don't know. I it's uh I'm not a Disney adult. Like something like that. Yeah, me neither. Never mind.

SPEAKER_11 34:52

Yeah, no, never mind. Whatever. Yeah, whatever.

SPEAKER_10 34:56

No, me neither, man. Shit's fucking for babies or whatever, just like therapy.

SPEAKER_04 35:01

Yeah, if I was like a stupid baby that was like a Disney adult or whatever, then you know maybe Splash Mountain would like uh give me like uh he'd like clear my polyps.

SPEAKER_11 35:11

Yeah, or maybe give you like three AIDS. But like good ones. Oh auto important no, I can't get there. I can't figure out an acronym. Someone shoot me.

SPEAKER_04 35:29

Angry intestine diarrhea syndrome. Did you guys see that six flags?

SPEAKER_11 35:34

That's not good. That's not a positive eight. Did you guys see that six flags is closing?

SPEAKER_07 35:41

What does that mean?

SPEAKER_04 35:41

You see that six nine's mom? Got robbed by the island boys? What? Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 35:49

Wait, all wait, I'm so confused.

SPEAKER_11 35:50

All this all six flags are closing. Wait, no, I misread the article. It's just some place in like Pennsylvania or something, not the one by Skype. Oh, three are closing by 2027.

SPEAKER_10 36:02

Do you guys want to buy an amusement park? Fill it with busty babes, make them go on the roller coasters. Dude.

SPEAKER_04 36:11

Sorry, ask them to go on the roller coasters. Yeah, I'm not gonna make anyone do anything.

SPEAKER_07 36:15

I hate roller coasters. I'm the worst person to go to a water park, roller coaster place. Wait, really? Yeah, I hate all that shit. I hate water skills.

SPEAKER_08 36:24

Thrill seeker. No, I'm not. You have the energy of a thrill seeker.

SPEAKER_04 36:30

That makes me feel better. Only skydiving. No, you've done that?

SPEAKER_07 36:34

No.

SPEAKER_11 36:36

Yeah, I don't think I do. I'm I'm I don't know if I'm built for that. I love roller coasters, but jumping out of a plane, even just watching the videos of people like up there getting prepped for it, I start to like sweat and pace. I don't know if I'm made for that.

SPEAKER_04 36:50

Sweat and pace.

SPEAKER_11 36:51

Also the bungee cording stuff just to me is like that shit's gonna I'd I'd be the one in one thousand or five thousand or whatever each year. It's gonna snap and I'm gonna hit a rock.

SPEAKER_07 37:02

That's exactly my thought process about roller coasters and water slides and airplanes and and bridges and ladders.

SPEAKER_11 37:09

And anything tall, and any but and like eating cookies after 8 p.m. and then swimming.

SPEAKER_07 37:14

No, not that one. Mostly just anything related to like heights.

SPEAKER_11 37:20

You guys ever have that feeling? I think it's called a vertigo, when you're like at some you're like on something tall, and then you look down and it goes like Dude, sometimes I'll look up at a tall building and I'll get fucking vertigo. Wow. Yeah. Is that I don't know how to describe it. It's like you like a telescope or something. Like you're zooming in and you go, whoa.

SPEAKER_04 37:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_11 37:39

You're like, and then you're like, maybe I should just maybe I could just do it. Maybe I should just jump. Maybe I can make it. Maybe it's just a joke. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Maybe I should just jump. There's actually a there's a French term for that, and it basically translates to the call of the void. But it's the feeling that we all get when like you're driving down the highway in your car and you're like, maybe I could just fucking.

SPEAKER_07 38:01

What is that? No, that actually has a word. What is that word?

SPEAKER_11 38:05

I don't know. I just know there's a French term for it.

SPEAKER_04 38:09

Jel Jalquin?

SPEAKER_07 38:11

Jocing? Jalkin? Jelquin. Jocquin? Or is it just called the call of the void? I thought it had a word.

SPEAKER_11 38:19

Maybe it's just it's like thoughts. It might be like uh like there's like you know, like there's deja vu, right? We all know this term. There's like three others that are something a vu that mean different things, and maybe it's one of those.

SPEAKER_07 38:35

I don't know. I thought it had like a scientific word that was like humongified. But I think it literally is just called the call of the void. Where you're just like, I'm like driving down the road and I'm like, what if I just went into this ditch at 79 miles per hour?

SPEAKER_02 38:53

Yeah, I could what would happen?

SPEAKER_11 38:57

What if I flip it? Did I tell you guys? Never mind. Not in the podcast.

SPEAKER_09 39:05

Uh what else? What else we got there, boys? What else we got?

SPEAKER_07 39:09

Uh I do love the that there's never there's no structure. There's no structure here. Penny fath! There's no structure.

SPEAKER_11 39:16

The penny fath. Penny fath. I only watched about two minutes of that video. Dude, me and Connor watched.

SPEAKER_07 39:25

This guy fucking shredded on a penny farthing. He shreds it. Doesn't he have to pedal the whole time?

SPEAKER_04 39:32

No, actually. Well, he figures out some interesting mechanics. Some penny farthing techniques to do what he needs to do. Dude, I have wave dashes.

SPEAKER_07 39:42

He waved dashes on the penny farth. No. It's called it's called farthing.

SPEAKER_11 39:48

Oh, I was playing some melee online last night. Oh, it's called Farth Dashing? Farth dashing? Sorry. What'd you say, Connor? C-Man?

SPEAKER_04 39:56

Old? You're old?

SPEAKER_11 39:58

Baby game? And you're old?

SPEAKER_04 40:00

How can it be this style? How can it be both things? Okay. Old people play shoots and ladders with their grandkids. And fucking candy land and shit.

SPEAKER_11 40:11

That's true. I was at a kid's birthday party this weekend. We did play a game called Chonk Stack. Chonk.

SPEAKER_01 40:18

You played you can't play Chonk Stack at a kid's birthday party.

SPEAKER_02 40:24

I don't make the reason.

SPEAKER_08 40:26

I did exactly that. I did play chonk stack at a kid's birthday party on Sunday.

SPEAKER_11 40:32

And it was a Cappy Bar themed birthday party, so I kept putting up videos of Cappy bars on our big old video wall at the place I work.

SPEAKER_01 40:40

Oh, that's cool.

SPEAKER_11 40:43

Yeah. Yeah. What do you guys know about Cappy bars? I learned a lot.

SPEAKER_07 40:50

Wasn't there like some Cappy bars found uh like in the remnants of 9-11?

SPEAKER_11 40:58

Like, yeah, they're actually you know they say it's an inside job. Yeah, the job. Well, Cappy Bar is the largest rodent in the world.

SPEAKER_03 41:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_11 41:09

And there was a bunch of Cappy bars inside of the World Trade Center that were called C4. Okay. Did you know where to take this?

SPEAKER_04 41:21

Are like native from?

SPEAKER_11 41:24

I don't.

SPEAKER_04 41:28

No, they they come from Little St. James Island. That's really yeah. Like Bubba? Uh-huh. Just like Bubba. Just like Bubba Max trapped.

SPEAKER_07 41:42

We're gonna scrap this whole thing. I made a joke about how the Jews get 9-11. That's gonna get censored. I thought they were gonna say the game bars were from Israel, but actually they're pedophiles.

SPEAKER_04 41:54

No, dude, I'm way more comfortable.

SPEAKER_07 41:56

What are we doing? I'm not even in Afghanistan. My brain's not in it. Dude, I'm fucking just I'm just I'm my filters, I don't have a filter. I'm just I'm just talking.

SPEAKER_04 42:06

Yeah, I mean, this is either gonna be uh terrible or kind of good. So the most gas we've ever made, man.

SPEAKER_07 42:13

I mean, as long as we censor pretty much like every single thing that we've said so far. Yeah. I'm gonna put apprentices heavily censor this one. Or we just let it fly.

SPEAKER_04 42:24

I don't know, we'll see. I'll listen back to you. Yeah, maybe it'll stink. Maybe it'll roll.

SPEAKER_11 42:30

Maybe it'll smell it so good.

SPEAKER_10 42:33

When I beat the pussy up and make it stink. You gotta see a doctor.

SPEAKER_11 42:37

Okay, you gotta censor that one.

SPEAKER_07 42:38

No, you'll keep that in, but you gotta see a doctor for that.

SPEAKER_11 42:41

I have one scheduled, man, but they're asking for so much money because I don't have insurance. They said those butthole polyps, they're gonna cost you two grand to pop to make them go bleak.

SPEAKER_04 42:52

Dude, I could remove them.

SPEAKER_11 42:54

Do you guys ever have like an old dog that gets like all those lumps and those butt butt polyps that you gotta pop and it's stinky liquid?

SPEAKER_07 43:01

Never once.

SPEAKER_04 43:02

No. That seems like a fucking I'll do respect, Max. I would just throw it out.

SPEAKER_07 43:08

It's a dog, man. You love it.

SPEAKER_04 43:10

I'd throw it out. I'd throw it out. I don't love a dog enough.

SPEAKER_07 43:14

I don't love a dog enough to pop its fucking shit polyps.

SPEAKER_04 43:17

It's a hundred and fifty.

SPEAKER_07 43:19

Yeah, you do.

SPEAKER_08 43:21

Yeah, for generations, dude. It's a magic dog. It can talk. Carol, if Carol.

SPEAKER_07 43:28

If Carol had ass polyps, I'd I'd I'd let her go outside for the first time without without uh without a fucking harness or a collar.

SPEAKER_11 43:35

What about the other one? Cheesy. No, Mac.

SPEAKER_07 43:39

Same thing. I'd let him live outside too.

SPEAKER_04 43:41

I mean if if my could if my dog could talk Brian style, I'd definitely pop ass pimples, but that's you know, absent that I'd get my loving wife's Brian style.

SPEAKER_07 43:52

I'd say, Yeah, I need you to pop his ass pimples. I don't want to pop his ass pimples. Homie! Homie!

SPEAKER_08 44:06

Why'd you feel like some pussy with some merch? It's me!

SPEAKER_11 44:15

Oh fuck, I lost that clip. I really wish I could have that back. That was fun. It's I the the it's still live on my channel. YouTube is so much better. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it, and Jeff Bezos can suck me the long way.

SPEAKER_05 44:32

Whoa! Whoa!

SPEAKER_11 44:35

Me and him, St. James Island or whatever it's called. Little Sunday. Little Sunday James. It's not a good place to go. We could buy it though. It's pretty cheap. It's only like 40 grand.

SPEAKER_07 44:49

Did you just win the fucking lottery or something? You want to buy a lot of stuff. You want to buy an amusement park? You want to buy Epstein Island? You want to buy a bunch of that you pitched like earlier before you started?

SPEAKER_11 45:00

Whoa. No, I didn't say that. That's a different max traffic.

SPEAKER_07 45:05

Yeah, you are the traffic. You started this. You went, I am the trafficker. Me, me, me. I am the trafficker.

SPEAKER_04 45:13

There's also something interesting about wanting to buy an amusement park and also an island that is.

SPEAKER_08 45:21

That is false correlation, okay? Those are two different trains at the top.

SPEAKER_01 45:27

I just think there's a training.

SPEAKER_08 45:28

Maybe we should buy a train.

SPEAKER_04 45:31

You want to buy a train to transport what?

SPEAKER_08 45:33

Fill it with coal.

SPEAKER_04 45:37

Oh, like the Polar Express filled with kids?

SPEAKER_11 45:40

Mm-mm. More like uh Penn Island. No, what's it called? Uh Snowpiercer.

SPEAKER_04 45:46

Oh, babies taste best.

SPEAKER_11 45:48

Babies taste. No, it's just people, right?

SPEAKER_04 45:50

Yeah, babies. Cockroaches.

SPEAKER_11 45:51

No, it's cockroaches. Babies taste bad. That's all.

SPEAKER_04 45:54

I don't want to say that. No, that's literally that's like the plot twist of Snowpiercer.

SPEAKER_11 46:00

No, it's not. It's that the food is made out like cockroaches or whatever.

SPEAKER_04 46:02

No, they eat people. It's people. It's people. That's the jelly. You think it's yeah, you think it's not, but it's people. Oh cannibalism. That movie sucks. There's like a big dramatic scene where like they go and they're like talking to the chef or whatever, and the chef he's like crying, and he's like baby.

SPEAKER_01 46:23

And the worst, the worst thing is the babies taste best.

SPEAKER_04 46:28

Yeah, it's like veal.

SPEAKER_11 46:31

You know. You ever had veal? It's kind of fucked up.

SPEAKER_07 46:35

I've never had veal before.

SPEAKER_04 46:38

Out of principle.

SPEAKER_07 46:39

Really? Not out of principle. I just never had the opportunity.

SPEAKER_11 46:43

High horse Connor. Huh? High horse C-man. Yeah, dude. You know it, man.

SPEAKER_04 46:49

They switched out. I bet you never had faux gra either. No, because that's the one where they like drown the duck in fat.

SPEAKER_11 46:57

No, they fill it up until its liver explodes. And it die.

SPEAKER_04 47:05

Dude, I'd I'd have uh Max Comfy. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_11 47:13

Which is where I'm super comfy in like a nice warm blanket, like a little burrito.

SPEAKER_04 47:18

Yeah, it's you all wrapped up, four blankets, all heated, you're all sweaty. Walk up to you, I give you a big old head, you hug, you just pop up, head stuck in the ceiling.

SPEAKER_11 47:32

You said a big old head first. Which I like.

SPEAKER_07 47:36

I like I like a big old head.

SPEAKER_11 47:40

Dude, I've been on this kick recently. I've been just eating chimmy changas for as many meals a day as I possibly can. You guys ever had a chimmy?

SPEAKER_04 47:47

Chimichongas and rice crispies with MMs is your diet right now.

SPEAKER_08 47:52

That is correct.

SPEAKER_11 47:56

That is so my breakfast, a Celsius, Rice Krispie, MMs, right? You don't eat for another 16 hours, and then you door dash a couple chimmy changs. How many is a couple? It depends on which place is open. Some pla one place gives you three, one place gives you one really good one. But the other place fills it with poop, throws it at your face. But you kinda I don't know. Like a crave it? You keep calling him back and say, hey, is still in? Can she do that thing again?

SPEAKER_04 48:36

Yeah, can she can she fling me the poop?

SPEAKER_11 48:39

Can she fling me the poop in my face? Make me mighty sick. Yeah, you guys should try Jimmy Changa, man. Changey.

SPEAKER_04 48:53

Vinny, are you familiar with uh metaphobia?

SPEAKER_07 48:57

No, what is that?

SPEAKER_04 49:00

Um it's when people like have a you know like an issue with like mouth noises or like gagging.

SPEAKER_07 49:08

Oh, I have that, probably. Me too. I hate the noise of people like uh chewing and go and s and like slurping, and I hate the the sound of people like crunching and like swallowing. I hate that sound too, and I hate the sound of like yeah, pretty much all that, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 49:24

Do you like what about like a stop it?

SPEAKER_07 49:28

That that doesn't bother me. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 49:31

Like, could you do could you give me an example of like like how you would do that noise?

SPEAKER_07 49:35

Of of you want me to gag?

SPEAKER_04 49:38

If you could.

SPEAKER_11 49:41

Stop, guys. Please stop.

unknown 49:46

Okay. Okay.

SPEAKER_10 49:49

Don't think about it. Think about something else.

SPEAKER_08 49:54

Stop! Please, please, stop, please. I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done. Jesus Christ, it gets me so good. That was fucking dangerous.

SPEAKER_11 50:07

Yeah, there's gonna be I'm gonna have to throw up my rice crispies. I haven't had my chimichangas yet.

SPEAKER_01 50:11

Oh, dude.

SPEAKER_11 50:12

I need the crispies in down to dorm dep. My brother asked me for what I want for Christmas yesterday, and he had two options. The first was DoorDash gift cards, and I went, yes, yes. Instantly, yes, yes. He said, so the first is DoorDash, and I went, yep. Mm-hmm. Yep. And then he was like, the second is a prepaid meal at a really nice spot by you, and I said, No. No, no. I need the changa. I need the changa. I need the changa. I need the changa podcast.

SPEAKER_04 50:44

Thoughts? I need the changa podcast.

SPEAKER_07 50:46

I need the changa podcast. That sounds like some that sounds good. I like the switch. I like the switch. I need the changa podcast. No, there's already 17 fucking Changa podcasts. What about the polycule? The polycule?

SPEAKER_08 51:02

Polycule. I really like that.

SPEAKER_01 51:08

Is that a thing?

SPEAKER_08 51:10

Chicha and the Changa.

SPEAKER_04 51:13

Um, the Polycule Podcast does not exist.

SPEAKER_02 51:18

Oh, welcome to the polycule.

SPEAKER_04 51:32

Well, no, because then, like, we have a guest on it's like, welcome to the polycule. You know, what's your king?

SPEAKER_07 51:37

We still don't have a fucking name for this.

SPEAKER_04 51:39

What's your circumference? No, like the polyclone.

SPEAKER_07 51:41

Like the polycule. It's not gonna be the polycule.

SPEAKER_04 51:44

I don't know. I feel like it's kind of polyphobic that you're against the polycule.

SPEAKER_07 51:48

Yeah.

unknown 51:49

Good.

SPEAKER_11 51:51

Good. Dude, where I live, and we all live in Detroit, a lot of polycule is running around. This shit. Really? We can get some really interesting guests. Oh my god, so many. Yeah. So many.

SPEAKER_04 52:03

I don't know how people do it. It's big. It's all the rage.

SPEAKER_11 52:06

It's all the rage, so let's start one.

SPEAKER_10 52:09

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_11 52:10

Okay. Then we could be brother ladies.

SPEAKER_07 52:16

What are the the the the housewives of the life the lives of housewives or something like that?

SPEAKER_04 52:22

The secret the secrets. The secret lives of housewives.

SPEAKER_07 52:24

The secret lives of househusbands.

SPEAKER_11 52:27

Wait, what is it? What are the like it's like the real housewives of whatever secret of the real house husbands of Detroit?

SPEAKER_08 52:34

The real housewives of Detroit!

SPEAKER_04 52:36

Oh, that exists, right?

SPEAKER_11 52:38

Polycule exists.

SPEAKER_07 52:39

Oh, fuck. We're not the polycule.

SPEAKER_04 52:45

The real polycule of South Detroit.

SPEAKER_07 52:48

Not happening. I put my foot down before I fucking ever become part of any form of a polycule.

SPEAKER_11 52:57

What if it's just a it's just for namesake? Alright, you convinced me. We can do it. Yeah, we don't actually have to mate or procreate. Okay, I'm convinced. Yeah. Or swap. I'm sorry, I misunderstood.

SPEAKER_07 53:08

No, I misunderstood.

SPEAKER_10 53:11

We could. Well, never mind. You want slow fluids?

SPEAKER_07 53:16

I mean, I was just like, I want your blood in my veins. I want your blood brothers.

SPEAKER_11 53:20

Yeah, we can all become blood brothers. We all slit our hands and just shake and then still.

SPEAKER_07 53:25

I want your blood in my veins. Let's get ducked.

SPEAKER_11 53:27

I want your blood in my veins. Let's make a song. Put your blood in my body. Put your blood in my bones. Dude, I was giving you a beat. No, no, keep going, keep going. I got something. I want your marrow. I want your blood. I want your love. Inside my body. Please fill me up. Please make me whole. Please turn me into a robot man. I think I might be back, yo.

SPEAKER_07 54:00

I think I might be back. That was mad traffic right there. Put that shit on fucking SoundCloud.

SPEAKER_11 54:10

I want your narrow.

SPEAKER_07 54:11

I want to be a robot.

SPEAKER_11 54:14

Robot man.

SPEAKER_04 54:16

I think that's fine. You gotta start freestyling more, Max.

SPEAKER_11 54:20

Dude, I've been thinking about doing a stream where I just rip some beats and talk about marrow and blood and guts.

SPEAKER_04 54:26

Yeah. It'd be nice.

SPEAKER_11 54:28

I want to be talk to me nice. Oh, robot man. Talk to me nice, yeah. Oh, what do you guys think is gonna be album of the year?

SPEAKER_07 54:39

Uh uh. What was Kanye's album he dropped this year? Cousins.

SPEAKER_04 54:47

The single is gonna be the album. No, bully. Cousins.

SPEAKER_07 54:54

Cousins is gonna sweep. It's going to bully.

SPEAKER_11 54:56

What about Chancellor Rapper, the big day? No, what's it actually called? Oh, what about what about what about Tom McDonald? We are okay.

SPEAKER_07 55:09

That's not Tom McDonald, was it?

SPEAKER_11 55:11

That was Tom. Timmy. Tammy. I think it's gonna go to anything Taylor Swift does when she talks about Travis Kelsey's pen or I gave my Travvy head.

SPEAKER_03 55:35

I gave my Travvy head.

SPEAKER_07 55:40

Well, okay. I do. We're at the one hour mark.

SPEAKER_11 55:47

Oh Vinny's out. Do he's got a call time?

SPEAKER_07 55:51

Uh I know the boys were looking to play a little Earth Frame.

SPEAKER_04 55:57

Oh, that's right, the new shit.

SPEAKER_07 56:00

And I I'm not gonna be there for that. We also forgot. We also forgot to do press conference. It's fine.

SPEAKER_11 56:11

We can just let that one die if we want to.

SPEAKER_07 56:13

No, no. No, you know what? Oh you know what? Oh, oh, oh.

SPEAKER_11 56:17

Hey everybody, welcome back.

SPEAKER_07 56:18

Welcome back. Welcome back to press conference. We have Max Traffic here. Max, please go up to the microphone.

SPEAKER_11 56:27

Um Bing, bing, bing. Is this thing on? It's on.

SPEAKER_07 56:30

Yeah, it's I already I was talking I was just talking into it. Oh, sorry. I didn't know. No, it's okay. You just made a fool of me and everything that I stand for. It's okay. So uh let's get started here. I'll get the first guest. Uh who wants to take a question here? I'll get the first one. Mr. Trevor, Mr. Trev, Mr. Trev, Mr. Trevor. Yeah, you.

SPEAKER_04 56:48

Yeah, hey, what's going on, buddy? Hey, it's uh it's fuck you, Carl, from HU Magazine.

SPEAKER_11 56:56

Oh, yeah. Your publication is really not nice to a lot of people. I fucking hate you. Okay, yeah. That's not a question, really.

SPEAKER_04 57:08

You fucking you disgust me. You said fuck. Yeah.

SPEAKER_11 57:13

Okay. Okay. And now the and now the the what do you call it? The announcer is spitting off.

SPEAKER_04 57:17

Do you want a question? Do you want a question? You want a question?

SPEAKER_11 57:19

I would I would like a qu yeah, please.

SPEAKER_04 57:21

Little pig boy, little pig boy wants a question.

SPEAKER_11 57:23

I wouldn't call myself a little pig boy, but yes, I could take I would like a question, please. Yes. How do you sleep? On my side in the fetal position mostly with the pillow in between my legs. AC on.

SPEAKER_07 57:36

Wait, is that actually true? Uh yeah. Hands, I do this weird thing. I didn't mean to interrupt. I didn't mean interrupt. I'm it's it's me the it's me the announcer. I'm sorry, I didn't want to interrupt.

SPEAKER_11 57:46

I just do you guys ever like bend at your wrist when you're sleeping? I kind of That's not what we're talking about, sir! Oh fucking disgusting.

SPEAKER_06 57:53

You make me Hawk Tula! Oh my god. To it, too, to it.

SPEAKER_04 57:58

I love that guy.

SPEAKER_07 58:00

Thanks, dude. I love you. What's your name again? What'd you say your name was? I love it too.

SPEAKER_04 58:04

Fuck you, Carl from Hate You Magazine.

SPEAKER_07 58:06

Fuck you, Carl from dude. Mr. Mr. Fuck, I really uh what's your last name? Is your is your last name? Mr. You Carl, or is it just Carl?

SPEAKER_04 58:13

Uh it's it's you hyphen Carl.

SPEAKER_07 58:15

Dude, Mr. U Carl, I dude, listen. You're a cool, I think you're a really cool guy. Honestly, dude. Dude. Thank you. No, like honestly.

SPEAKER_04 58:23

I'm so glad. I'm so glad to be here. If this sick fuck wasn't in front of me, I'd be so happy.

SPEAKER_11 58:27

Hey, Mr. Hey, fuck. That's pretty cool that you talk about.

SPEAKER_04 58:31

That's that's Mr. That's Mr. U Carl. That's Mr. U Carl.

SPEAKER_06 58:36

Mr.

SPEAKER_07 58:37

U Carl. Uh hey, dude. You've been working out recently. You're looking you're looking good. Can we get to the questions, please? What am I doing? Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Seriously, what how much do you bench?

SPEAKER_04 58:51

Five fitty.

SPEAKER_07 58:52

Wow. I could tell. I could tell. Hey, the adults talking? The adults talking? Oh, oh. Alright. Okay. I'm gonna get out of here, guys. I got a I have a colonoscopy in about three days. I really gotta start prepping for that, so I gotta get out of here. But, anyways, all right, you guys. Yeah, you got it fast. Max.

SPEAKER_04 59:09

I rest my case. Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 59:11

Anyways, you got it from your dude. You can answer anybody. Whatever. You include it. Sounds good.

SPEAKER_11 59:15

Hey, thank thank you for facilitating the first one, though. I appreciate that. Shut up. Okay.

SPEAKER_06 59:22

Call on me. Call on me. Me, me, me, me, me. Call on me. Yeah, the that guy, the call me guy. Call on me. Call on me guy.

SPEAKER_11 59:32

Call on me guy.

SPEAKER_06 59:33

Hey, it's call on me from Call On Me News.

SPEAKER_11 59:36

Oh, wow. Is it all made off of you? Is it all based around you?

SPEAKER_06 59:41

Let's skip the pleasantries. How did you do it?

SPEAKER_07 59:44

How did you manage to do that in that bath with that boy?

SPEAKER_11 59:50

I already know what the crime of being confused of is, which is fantastic. But I didn't. I was never in the bath with any boy, except my brother when I was younger. He didn't like it. I loved it. That sounds really incriminating. Well, he's older than me, and I just wanted to get to spend time around him, and I was little. I was like three. Oh, okay. Call on me, call on me. Sorry, I have I have dreads.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:18

It's all good. You don't you don't need to apologize.

SPEAKER_06 1:00:21

Call on me, call on me. Sorry, man. Yeah, no. It makes my life hard, man. Call on me. It makes me hard. It makes me hard. It makes me hard. It makes me hard. I'm gonna turn off. Call on me, call on me.

SPEAKER_11 1:00:34

I can imagine how that would be difficult, especially with like you don't want to be called on, and your tick is that you'd say call on me all the time.

SPEAKER_07 1:00:41

Dude, I'm fucking with you. I don't have Tourette's. Okay, alright. Get this guy out of here. What the fuck? Alright, you guys, I do uh stand up every Wednesday and Friday, 9 p.m. down at the armory. I'll see you guys down there. Yeah, okay. This guy rocks. He walks out.

SPEAKER_11 1:00:58

Okay, alright. Now I guess I'm moving on to the next question then. Anyone have a question for me? Me, me, me, me, me, me. The soft spoken mousey fellow. Me. Oh, hi hi, hi, Max.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:10

Um well, uh, it's good to see you outside of the bathroom.

SPEAKER_08 1:01:14

Okay, wait, what?

SPEAKER_11 1:01:15

And how would you see me in the bathroom? Well, uh, you you taught me things. I didn't teach you, I've never seen you before in my life.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:23

So you weren't you weren't in the bath, um, but you were outside of it, and you were showing me certain inversion tactics, is what you called them. Tucking? Well, but becoming a girl.

SPEAKER_11 1:01:39

I why? Why?

SPEAKER_04 1:01:41

Why?

SPEAKER_11 1:01:43

I didn't know if you ever wanted to do drag, maybe I could teach anybody how to tuck. I have a YouTube tutorial about it. I wasn't by you in the b sorry, what's your name again?

SPEAKER_04 1:01:55

Um Well, it's kind of sad you don't even remember. I I've never met you in the back of the day. After all the time. I mean it was it was like four hours.

SPEAKER_11 1:02:05

There's no way we spent four hours together outside of ever. Ever, actually. Just ever.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:11

My name, my name is Cap Capabara Stanley.

SPEAKER_11 1:02:16

Okay, okay, now I see what we're doing here. Okay, Capabar Stanley. Great name. Largest rodent in the world.

SPEAKER_07 1:02:24

No, the largest rodent in the world is you, my friend, because you're a fucking rat piece of shit. You're a sick fuck. It's me. Ratfucker9000. Uh I'm actually. I just have a DoorDash here for Mr. Capabara Stanley. Is he here? Hello? Oh, oh, fuck yeah. Oh did you get a Jimmy Changa? Shh. Thank you, didn't. No, here you go. Hold on, I gotta take a picture real quick. Hold on. Hold on. Okay, you're good. Okay, reveals his genitals. What'd you get? What did you- Oh, Qdoba. Fucking make me sick. Yeah, I got a burrito. I step on him. He's gonna kill him. What happened to that rodent man? I squashed him under my big boot. Alright, okay. Alright. Oh my god! Isn't that max traffic? Yeah, hey, dude! I just saw what you did on the news earlier today. Oh, this is the press conference. I didn't do anything. Oh my god, wait, that's him. That's the Capy Bar. I resurrect him with my book of magic. Oh Dude, did did he actually do did he actually do that thing that you that I saw on the news to you today? Today? Yeah, he did. Today? I didn't even remember your name. How do we get a prep card? Okay. Wait, hold on, hold on. Hold on. Mr. 9000, Mr. Capybara. 72. You're 72. Okay. I actually suddenly This doesn't really feel like a crime anymore, to be honest. If you're 72.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:51

Mr. 9000? Yeah, what's up? It felt so good to be flat.

SPEAKER_07 1:03:55

Oh, really? You want me to do it again? Because I I still got my big boot. Take me back. Squash him. Bob's like a grease. He's so flat. He's so flat. He's so flat. Cameraman, get over here. Cameran, cameraman, get over here. Zooming on that. He's so flat.

unknown 1:04:13

What?

SPEAKER_07 1:04:14

So funny. He's flat. Alright, well, uh Okay.

SPEAKER_11 1:04:19

Press conference is over. I'm gonna recede to my chambers or whatever.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:22

Yeah, shut up, dude. You make me sick.

SPEAKER_11 1:04:25

And I can guess, I believe I can guess my crime pretty accurately.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:28

What was your crime?

SPEAKER_11 1:04:30

That I taught a 17-year-old man how to be a girl in the bathtub.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:34

You got it! You got it!

SPEAKER_01 1:04:37

Nice.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:38

And for the audience that we never revealed the prompt to prior, that actually was the prompt. All I got was a textbook comment that said, Max made me a girl in the bath.

SPEAKER_11 1:04:46

Well, I guess I'm not two for two. I'm two for four or whatever.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:49

You're two for you're two for out of all six episodes, we've only not done it one episode, and that's because we were doing your bank statement. So you're two for five.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:58

You're six for seven for five.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:59

You're six for seven. End it. End it scrap it.